While self-sabotage is often defined as destructive actions or behaviour directed at yourself, it can also be seen as not doing things or avoiding important issues, leading us to suffer even more. Self-sabotaging behaviour occurs both intentionally and unconsciously, and it affects almost every aspect of our lives.

But it is on the mental health front where most of the damage gets done. Since the state of our minds determines our happiness and ability to cope with everyday issues, when we self-sabotage, the damage we do to ourselves is often far worse than if these problems arose because of external factors beyond our control.
These are just a few of the areas of our lives where self-sabotage hits us the hardest.

• Relationships – Whether it’s friends or family, self-sabotaging behaviour is especially hard on our relationships. When others see us self-destructing, they tend to avoid us, afraid that these tendencies may affect them, or because they believe we’re supposed to sort things out ourselves. This takes a heavier toll on our relationships, as self-sabotage is often misinterpreted and garners little sympathy.

• Our work & professional careers – People who self-sabotage at work often find themselves in hot water because many of these associated behaviours can affect our colleagues, the business and our direct work performance. This means that people seen as ‘self-saboteurs’ in the workplace are isolated and sometimes even fired.
• Ourselves – Possibly the area of our lives most affected by self-sabotage is our own sense of self-worth. Whenever we realize what we’ve done to hurt ourselves, our sense of self takes a hit. This leaves us feeling deflated, unmotivated and angry at ourselves all the time. As we look back on our self-sabotaging behaviour, we end up hating ourselves, leading to more destructive behaviours in the long term.